Not 17

She is not 17 anymore
Her hair isn't wavy and her lipstick isn't smeared
She only smokes 2 cigarettes on a bad day and puts the rest of the pack away
She stopped staring out windows watching strangers walk by
Inventing her own stories for their fascinating lives

She doesn't bite her nails or take knives to her wrist
She doesn't cut school or chase boys trying to get a kiss
She doesn't runaway from the demons at her back
She doesn't dwell on all the things she used to think she lacked

Emotions don't control her the way that they once did
She doesn't try to avoid growing up, pretending that she is still a kid.
She pays no mind to the women whose sole purpose is to make a normal girl feel bad
She doesn't make lists of things that she wishes she had

There are days she walks down streets now with her head held high
Nights she can fall asleep without feeling compelled to cry
Moments she can take in deeply, like a breath of fresh air
She surrounds herself with people who she knows genuinely care

She isn't depriving herself daily of food or joy
Her world isn't ruled by the opinion of all the high school boys
Her body is stronger and her mind more stable
Allowing herself to feel happy of that she knows that she is able.